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 You cannot really mean that, I said finally.
Nicole lifted her head as she straddled my hips.  Tell me you love me, Al.
I laughed.  Of course I love you. You know that.
 I wanna hear you say it. I love it when you say it.
 I love you, my dear. I love you with the ferocity of a lioness with her cubs. I love you with the sureness
of the sun rising in the east each morning.
 Is it really true? Could you make me into a vampire?
I felt my expression grow serious. The logic of lovers is quite the dangerous game.  Yes, it is true. If you
were to drink of my blood, you would die, but rise again as one who must hunt in the night.
 Make me like you. I want to be like you.
 No. Absolutely not, Nicole. Ask me anything, anything at all, anything but that. I will not do that.
Her smile faded away.  You said you love me. Wouldn t you do this for someone you love? I love you,
Al. I want to be your lover forever.
 My love for you is precisely why I would not do this. If I were to make you into a vampire, I would not
be giving you something. I would be taking something precious away from you.
 You mean my life? She shook her head vigorously.  My life? My life s a fucking joke. It s all pain and
sickness, growing old and then dying. Hell, you get to live forever.
 Nicole, my love, what happened to me is something that never should have happened. My wife and I
should have grown old together, taken care of each other when we were sick. We should have died
together. Should have been buried together. Do you know what it is you ask of me?
 But we could be lovers forever.
I cupped my hand against her cheek, but she pushed it away.  If you became a vampire, you would lose
interest in me.
She grabbed my hand and pressed it against her soft breast.  No, I wouldn t, Al. No way.
I nodded sadly.  Vampires have no need for reproductive organs. Like me, you would lose your ability
to have an orgasm. And like me, you would hunger for the sweet taste of human pleasure. You would
seek human men, perhaps human women, in order to taste their orgasm the way I taste yours.
She appeared to pout silently; I had hoped she would not be one to pout. That has always seemed mere
manipulation performed by those of an inferior level of maturity.
 What is wrong, Nicole?
Her eyes glistened slightly, but she did not cry.  I m sorry, Al. Vodka makes me get kinda mushy, kinda
silly sometimes. It s just I m scared to die.
I sat up and hugged her tightly.  There is nothing at all wrong with being frightened of dying. To fear
death is simply to be human. All I can say is that it is normal to fear the unknown, and that is exactly what
death is, the unknowable unknown. I myself died, but remain bound to this Earth by that which courses
through my veins. As to what awaits all of us, I do not know, though I can say it is not anything of which
to be frightened.
She somehow did not seem to fully comprehend my words.
 But if I was a vampire, I wouldn t have to be scared anymore.
 Vampires constantly face destruction. We have to walk around in fear all the time, fearing the suspicion
and hatred from the humans who inadvertently allow us to maintain our existence. Do you know what
immortality really means? It means an eternity of watching others die, being doomed to an eternity of
loneliness with mere interludes of friendship. Vampires so often shy from intimacy with humans because
the mere wink of an eye for us is a lifetime for a mortal.
Nicole stared ahead pensively before collapsing onto the bed.  I m sorry, Al. I m just being silly.
I kissed her on the forehead.  It is perfectly okay for you to be silly every once in awhile. I will love you
anyway.
She smiled and yawned.  God, I m suddenly tired. Is it okay if we don t make love tonight?
 Of course, my sweet.
She stripped off her clothing and crawled underneath the covers. And she spoke not another word
before lapsing into slumber.
I reached for her, but Nicole eased herself to the far side of the bed, a chasm separating us, cold as a
grave.
Chapter 16
Vampire Cabbies in Love
Lemme guess. Sounds like a one-way ticket to dump city. So, the bitch dumped you for the guy in
the bar?
Sir! By the torments of Hades, you will not speak of Nicole in such a manner. And you will cease these
interruptions. They are most impolite, and please do not jump ahead of the story. If you were to call me a
fool, you would be absolutely correct. I was a fool, fooled by love, my vision clouded by the giddiness of
the emotions of the immature.
Nicole quickly became incommunicado. Looking forward to our usual Tuesday tryst, disappointment
greeted me as Dexter told me that she had called in sick. A half-dozen messages left on her answering
machine brought no reply. Saturday our night came and went, with me stalking State Street alone,
half-heartedly searching for Madison s other vampire, but, as you Americans would put it, it was not
unlike perusing a haystack for a mere needle.
By the next week, the peonies began to bloom full bloom, making it so easy to forget about how drab the
city had been just weeks before when the streets were covered with the slush of the melting snows. Still,
slush-covered asphalt was all that filled my inner sight, so heavy was my heart.
Finally, a phone call to Nicole s house brought an answer. It was Maggie. I m not here, a muffled voice
said from the background.
 She s not here, Al, Maggie said after a brief pause.
 Tell her I am sorry to hear that. With not another word, I dropped the handset onto its cradle, shaking
my head, laughing bitterly at myself.
You know, after a thousand years, it is not difficult to be philosophical about those things that happen to
us in our intercourse with others. I tried to focus on the sheer bliss of the previous month, but the task
proved difficult, so I attempted to seek solace in the fact that good or bad, at least she made me feel
something.
The next night, parked at the Concourse taxi stand, Maggie joined me in my cab. I quickly turned off the [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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